Happy! Happy! Happy!

I thought I would start my post with posting a picture of myself. No, I am not vain but I have been working out for about 4 months now and it is really paying off. I am 30 pounds lighter! I am starting to see those cuts and curves. I have a hell of a lot more energy and I just feel freaking good! Even though the majority of people I meet are into thick boys. It is something I just want to do for me! I love my body and my size. I just want to be more toned.

Now I must release and bring closure to my last post in regards to "Internet love". The situation is over! Last night at 2:00 am I dropped him off at the airport. We rode to the airport in silence. He removed his bags from my truck. Shut my door and I drove off. No goodbye, wish you well, fuck off or anything. Let me just explain what I was dealing with. Now mind you he was suppose to be moving down here to better his life. Go back to school and all that good stuff. Well, he was here a whole week and the only thing he was interested in was smoking and drinking. The irritation began when I would come home from working 8 hours and he would have issues with what I wanted to watch on my own TV. Mind you I pay the electric bill for the TV to work. It's my TV and he was laying around all dam day in my house. So how and the hell can he dictate what the hell I wanted to watch on my TV. Then he had hygiene issues! So not only are you worthless but you stink! Not once did he try to find a school, learn his new area, or even attempt to find a job. The kicker was when his "best friend" called and his dumb ass put him on speaker. The guy asked " I don't know if you and him have anything going on but I didn't want to be disrespectful and call there and ask to speak to my baby or boo! He replies, Nothing is going on. He is just my boy!" Mind you he was moving down here for life, love, and the pursuit of happiness. There was a lot of other things that I had issues with but what brought everything to ahead was when he was on my phone telling his "best friend" that he sick of my boring life and arguing with me. He wish I would just do what he says and things would be so much better. I lost it! I told him to tell his best friend to send your ass a ticket to get home! He had disrespected me and my home for the last time. I got dressed, assisted him in packing his shit and the rest is history! I have never met anyone in my life that didn't have a sense of what it means to go to work or to pay a bill! He felt that my life was boring because I went to work the majority of the time.

At 35 years old I learned that my days of having to raise someone is over. I have finally faced that fact that I am in a different place in my life and my tolerance for immaturity is low. I think because of my past experiences, I have gotten use to dealing with people who are of lower standards and success. I have this nurturing need and it seems like I attract people who are needy to some degree. I think it is my own issues with dealing with someone on my level. I think when you deal with someone who is needy or isn't at the same level you are on. There is a sense of control that you feel you have. But in those type of relationships there is no equality. It's draining mentally and financially.I have no regrets about going through this situation. Because I learned from it. I learned who I am a little bit more. I am glad to have had this experience. I know I will never have it again. At least I can say that I gave it a try!